thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

SLEEP TIME IS NOW
SWEET DREAMS HUMAN
I WILL BE HERE, SHARING MY WARMTHS 
I GOOD DOG
I KEEP MY HUMAN SAFE 

steadymobbing:

steadymobbing:

i asked my mom how she met my dad and she said at a college basketball game this guy got distracted and got hit by the ball and got a huge bloody nose and he came up to her after the game and said “i was distracted by you” with like blood all over his face and jersey

so i asked my dad and he said “my friend told me he’d give me 10 bucks if i asked a girl out with my broken nose and she said yes”

(Source: ptolemaic, via t3sticl3z)



absentions:

And if you’re still up at 4 a.m.,

you are in love or lonely,

and I don’t know which one is worse.

(Source: absentions, via t3sticl3z)



everythingsexxual:

Is this heaven?
memeguy-com:

My dog isnt the most trusting passenger either